The way we deal with failure

All of us want to be successful in life - it is only part of human nature. However, not many of us are willing to take the other side of success - failure. We see failures like a disease to avoid, as if it is not ok to fail. As a matter of fact, we look down to people who fail. Life is all about winning, no one would like to be a loser and the word "loser" is as threatening as a time bomb. Some people take failures to the extremes that they opt for a suicide. Fail and you are not worth of living.

It is funny, if not ridiculous at times, to see how strong people react to failure. The thing is, success comes with failures. It is like the two sides of a coin or a double edged sword. Success and failure come in a package and you cannot have one without the other. If only we can be successful without failures at all... But life doesn't go that way. It is almost like we cannot succeed without failing. Thomas Alva Edison had to do hundreds of experiments before he finally found the light bulb. He even said that genius is 1% talent and 99% hard work. It means that to succeed we have to go through a series of failures. And for those who cannot take the failures, they'd better not expect any success at all. Some people are so lucky to have a successful life delivered in a silver platter to their hands. But those are exceptional cases and most likely they cannot survive turmoil should it ever happen to their lives. The real winners are those who can go through the life's ups and downs, most of them had to undergo life shattering challenges.

All of us have to deal with failures at some point in our lives, whether we like it or not. It is part of life. However, the way we deal with it is what separates winners from losers. We know the term "crack under pressure" to describe those who cannot withstand life challenges. Not many can, let alone are willing to, deal with failures. Dealing with failures is not an easy task, and not many can actually make it. That's why there are only a few numbers of winners and people put so much high regard to the winners. If they have to be honest, not many people are actually willing to go through what the winners have gone through. It seems like we have a higher chance of failing than succeeding, in which case we'd better learn how to face it with a big heart.

What will be the better way to deal with failures? First, failing is not the same as being a loser. We see that failures are synonymous with challenges and people give a big admiration to those who have the courage to face the challenges of life, whether they succeed or fail. The courage itself what makes someone a winner. People loathe losers because losers are not willing to even try. People don't like the trait of giving in, not the failing. Troopers die in a war, but they die with honor, no one patronizes them for failing to survive. Troopers die as a hero. Therefore, we can fail and be winners because we fight to the end. Losers don't fight, it's a different story. Both fail but they are not the same.

Second, failures provide the opportunity to learn. By conducting the experiments hundreds of times, Edison learned how to create a light bulb. Each step, if we can consider it a failure, brought him to the next level. We cannot get to the hundredth of steps without the first, second, third steps and so on. Winners are those who keep rising after the falls, because each fall brings them the impetus, the new energy and spirit to start over. Failing provides the downtime to retreat, rest and recharge the battery so that we can come back fresh and strong. Success and failure are like day and night, each takes the turns so that the other may exist. Both are like buddies, without one the other cannot exist.

Third, if we see failures as a test, we simply have to believe that God will not give a test unless He knows that the person is big enough for the test. The bigger the challenge, the bigger the person. Therefore, it is an honor to receive such a big challenge, it means that God trusts us to be big enough for the challenge. It is like a recognition of our own abilities to handle tough situations. After all, who won't be honored to gain such a recognition by God Himself? Like winning an Oscar, isn't it?
Taken from: andri wongso's wisdom articles